summer time

i usually (well for the past 4 summers) have worked at a christian summer camp called Brookhill Ranch. I have been going there since I was in 3rd grade and this is the first summer I will not be. (that is horrible syntax but you get the point)

as you can guess Brookhill, the staff and the campers have been a HUGE part of my life, not only as I was growing up but also as a teenager and young college student.

I was an all summer staff member for 4 years and during that time I had the opportunity to serve in a full time ministry, be under intense mentoring, and love kids as I followed Jesus. That experience has made me who I am today. So in many ways deciding not to return to camp is like closing a huge chapter of my life and opening a new one; actually it's more like finishing a volume of a large collection of books, setting it aside and going onto the next volume.

So as you can see camp has been kind of a big of a deal to me in many ways.

But even as I write this and look at the facebook pictures of campers, I know I am in the right place. I have such a limited vision for my life sometimes that all I see is what I am missing out on this summer, but what I don't see (right away) is how God's preparing me for the rest of my life through the time He's given me this summer.

I have precious time to study God's word, to pray for the staff at camp and the campers; I have time to spend with my family and time to grow patience through my summer job (babysitting ;) ). Time is something I have not had much of since I was in high school. So the idea that time is a blessing has taken some getting used to. Time to me used to be a lull in between weekend adventures at school or a preparation time to switch over from one big event to the next big event in my life. I realized that since I have been 16 years old there has never been a large span of time (aka 3.5 months) to literally do "nothing".

At first this down time was seen as unproductive nothingness. I felt weird having "nothing" to do. But in reality I had plenty to do it was just nothing "exciting" or so I thought. I have been so used to BIG THINGS and BIG TASKS and GO GO GO that I had forgotten how to just enjoy life in the day to day, over all I was very discontented with how my summer was looking.

I knew that I had to learn to find joy, contentment and purpose in my day to day life, because let's face it life is usually more "normal" than living big event to big event to big event.

I am still learning all of this and I will be learning new ways to find joy and contentment in the Lord and His plan for my life and day to day for the REST of my life BUT now that I recognize this need in my heart I can take this first big step towards growth.

hopefully all of my rambling has been a blessing to you (whoever you may be)

and i pray that as you go on your faith journey that you remain open to God's voice--that you're open to change and that you're open to an adventure with Him: Whether that adventure is stepping out of something/somewhere you love or into something/somewhere you're afraid of.

love and kisses

IN HIS GRASP <><